A person's speech is a very important character trait, it can be used to determine not only the level of education, but also the degree of his responsibility and discipline. Speech betrays his attitude towards other people, himself, his work. Therefore, any person who wants to achieve success in communicating with other people needs to work on his speech. The rules of speech etiquette, a summary of which each of us learns in childhood, contribute to a better understanding between people and help establish relationships.
The concept of speech etiquette
Etiquette is a set of norms and rules of conduct, usually an unwritten code that each person learns along with culture. Compliance with the rules of speech etiquette is usually not required to be performed inordered or written, but they are mandatory for anyone who wants to build relationships with other people. Speech etiquette prescribes the desired verbal design of typical communication situations. Nobody invented these rules intentionally, they were formed in the course of human communication over millennia. Each etiquette formula has its roots, functions and variants. Speech etiquette, etiquette rules are a sign of a well-mannered and polite person and subconsciously tune in to a positive perception of the person using them.
History of occurrence
The word "etiquette" in French came from Greece. Etymologically, it goes back to the root, meaning order, rule. In France, the word was used to refer to a special card on which the rules of seating and behavior at the royal table were written. But in the time of Louis the Fourteenth, the very phenomenon of etiquette, of course, does not arise, it has a much more ancient origin. The rules of speech etiquette, a summary of which can be described by the phrase "successful communication", begin to take shape when people had to learn to build relationships and negotiate with each other. Already in ancient times, there were rules of conduct that helped interlocutors overcome mutual distrust and establish interaction. So, the code of good behavior is described in the texts of the ancient Greeks, Egyptians. Etiquette rules in ancient times were a kind of ritual that prompted interlocutors that they were “of the same blood”, that they were notpose a threat. Each ritual had a verbal and non-verbal component. Gradually, the original meaning of many actions is lost, but the ritual and its verbal design are preserved and continue to be reproduced.
Functions of speech etiquette
A modern person often has the question of why we need the rules of speech etiquette? In short, you can answer - to please other people. The main function of speech etiquette is to establish contact. When the interlocutor follows the general rules, this makes him more understandable and predictable, we subconsciously trust what is familiar to us more. This has been going on since primitive times, when the world around was very unguaranteed and danger threatened from everywhere, the observance of rituals was then extremely important. And when a communication partner performed a familiar set of actions, said the right words, this removed some of the distrust and facilitated contact. Today, our genetic memory also tells us that a person who follows the rules can be more trusted. The rules and norms of speech etiquette perform the function of forming a positive emotional atmosphere, helping to have a beneficial effect on the interlocutor. Speech etiquette also acts as a means of demonstrating respect for the interlocutor, helps to emphasize the status distribution of roles between communicators and the status of the communication situation itself - business, informal, friendly. Thus, the rules of speech etiquette are a tool for preventing conflicts. Part of the tension is relievedsimple etiquette formulas. Speech etiquette as a formal part of ethics performs a regulatory function, it helps to establish contacts, influences people's behavior in typical situations.
Types of speech etiquette
Like any speech, etiquette speech behavior is very different in its written and oral form. The written variety has more stringent rules, and in this form, etiquette formulas are more mandatory for use. The oral form is more democratic, some omissions or replacement of words with actions are allowed here. For example, sometimes instead of the word "Hello", you can do with a nod of the head or a slight bow.
Etiquette dictates the rules of behavior in certain areas and situations. It is customary to distinguish several different types of speech etiquette. Official, business or professional speech etiquette defines the rules of speech behavior in the performance of official duties, in negotiations, and in the preparation of documents. This view is rather highly formalized, especially in its written form. The rules of Russian speech etiquette in formal and informal settings can be very different, the first signal of the transition from one type of etiquette to another may be the change of appeal to “you” to the appeal to “you”. Everyday speech etiquette is more free than official, there is a large variability in key etiquette formulas. There are also such varieties of speech etiquette as diplomatic, military and religious.
Principles of modern speech etiquette
Any rules of conduct come from the universal principles of morality, speech etiquette is no exception. The golden rule of speech etiquette is based on the main moral principle formulated by I. Kant: act towards others as you would like to be treated towards you. Thus, polite speech should also include such formulas that the person himself would be pleased to hear. The basic principles of speech etiquette are relevance, accuracy, brevity and correctness. The speaker must select speech formulas in accordance with the situation, the status of the interlocutor, the degree of acquaintance with him. In any case, you should speak as briefly as possible, but do not lose the meaning of what was said. And, of course, the speaker must respect his communication partner and try to build his statement in accordance with the rules of the Russian language. Speech etiquette is based on two more important principles: goodwill and cooperation. A polite person treats other people with an initial attitude of kindness, he must be sincere and friendly. Communicators on both sides should do everything to make communication productive, mutually beneficial and enjoyable for all participants.
Label situations
Etiquette regulates behavior in various situations. Traditionally, speech differs significantly in official settings and in everyday life, as well as in different forms of itsexistence: in written or oral. However, there are general rules of speech etiquette in various speech situations. The list of such cases is the same for any spheres, cultures and forms. Standard etiquette situations include:
- greeting;
- attracting attention and appeal;
- introduction and introduction;
- invitation;
- offer;
- request;
- advice;
- gratitude;
- refusal and consent;
- congratulations;
- condolences;
- sympathy and consolation;
- compliment.
Each etiquette situation has a stable set of speech formulas that are recommended for use.
National peculiarities of etiquette
Speech etiquette is based on universal, universal moral principles. Therefore, its basis is the same in all cultures. Such universal principles, characteristic of all countries, include restraint in the manifestation of emotions, politeness, literacy and the ability to use standard speech formulas appropriate to the situation, and a positive attitude towards the interlocutor. But the private implementation of universal norms can vary significantly in different national cultures. Variation usually manifests itself in the speech design of a standard situation. The general culture of communication affects the national speech etiquette. The rules of etiquette, for example, in Russian, involve maintaining a conversation even with strangers if you happen to be with them in a confined space (in a train compartment), while the Japanese and the Britishthey will try to remain silent in the same circumstances or speak on the most neutral topics. In order not to get into a mess when communicating with foreigners, you should, when preparing for a meeting, familiarize yourself with their etiquette rules.
Contact situation
The basic rules of speech etiquette at the beginning of a conversation are related to the speech design of greetings and appeals. For the Russian language, the main greeting formula is the word "hello". Its synonyms can be the phrases “greeting you” with an archaic connotation and “good afternoon, morning, evening” are more sincere than the main wording. The stage of greeting is one of the most important in establishing contact, the words should be pronounced with sincere intonation, with notes of positive emotionality.
Means of attracting attention are the words: "let / allow me to turn", "sorry", "sorry" and adding an explanatory phrase to them: representations, requests, suggestions.
Conversion situation
Appeal is one of the difficult etiquette situations, as it can be difficult to find the right name for the person you need to address. In Russian today, the address “mister / madam” is considered universal, but in speech they still do not always take root well due to negative connotations in Soviet times. The best treatment is by name, patronymic or by name, but it is not always possible. Worst option: handling the words "girl", "woman", "man". In a professional setting, you canapply by the title of a person, for example, "Mr. Director". The general rules of speech etiquette can be briefly described as the desire for the comfort of communicants. In no case should the appeal indicate any personal characteristics of a person (gender, age, nationality, faith).
Contact termination situation
The final stage in communication is also very important, it will be remembered by the interlocutors and you need to try to leave a positive impression. The usual rules of speech etiquette, examples of which we have known since childhood, recommend using traditional phrases for parting: “goodbye”, “see you”, “goodbye”. However, the final stage should also include words of gratitude for the time spent on communication, perhaps for joint work. You can also additionally express hopes for continued cooperation, say parting words. Speech etiquette, etiquette rules recommend maintaining a favorable impression at the end of contact, creating an emotional atmosphere of sincerity and warmth. This is helped by more stable formulas: “it was very nice to talk with you, I hope for further cooperation.” But formulaic phrases should be pronounced as sincerely and with feeling as possible, so that they acquire a true meaning. Otherwise, farewell will not leave the desired emotional response in the memory of the interlocutor.
Representation and dating rules
The situation of acquaintance requires a solution to the issue of appeal. Business communication, contacts with unfamiliar people imply an appeal to “you”. According to the rules of speech etiquette, on "you"You can contact each other only within the framework of friendly and everyday communication. The presentation is made out with such phrases as “let me introduce you”, “please get acquainted”, “let me introduce you”. The presenter also gives a brief description of the represented: “position, full name, place of work, or some particularly noteworthy detail.” Acquaintances must, in addition to voicing their name, say positive words: “pleased to meet you”, “very nice.”
Rules of congratulations and gratitude
Modern rules of speech etiquette in Russian offer a fairly large assortment of formulas for expressing gratitude. From a simple "thank you" and "thank you" to "infinitely grateful" and "much grateful." It is customary for a great service or gift to add an additional positive phrase to the words of gratitude, for example, “very nice”, “I am touched”, “you are so kind”. There are a lot of formulas for congratulations. When composing a congratulation on any occasion, it is worth considering individual words, in addition to the usual “congratulations”, which would emphasize the peculiarity of the occasion and the personality of the person honored. The text of the congratulations necessarily includes any wishes, it is desirable that they are not stereotyped, but correspond to the personality of the hero of the occasion. Congratulation should be pronounced with a special feeling that will give great value to the words.
Rules of invitation, offer, request, consent and refusal
When inviting someone to take part in something, you should also follow the rules of speech etiquette. situationsinvitations, offers and requests are somewhat similar, in which the speaker always slightly lowers the status of his role in communication and emphasizes the importance of the interlocutor. The stable expressions of the invitation is the phrase “we have the honor to invite”, which notes the special importance of the invitee. For invitation, offer and request, the words “please”, “be kind”, “please” are used. In the invitation and the proposal, you can additionally say about your feelings for the invitee: “we will be glad / happy to see you”, “we are happy to offer you”. Request - a situation in which the speaker deliberately lowers his position in communication, but you should not overdo it, the traditional format of the request is the words: “please”, “could you”. Consent and refusal require different speech behavior. If consent can be extremely concise, then the refusal must be accompanied by mitigating and motivating wording, for example, “unfortunately, we are forced to refuse your proposal, because at the moment …”.
Rules of condolence, sympathy and apology
In dramatic and tragic situations, speech etiquette, the rules of etiquette recommend expressing only sincere feelings. Usually, regret and sympathy should be accompanied by encouraging words, for example, “we sympathize with you in connection … and sincerely hope that …”. Condolences are brought only on really tragic occasions, it is also appropriate to talk about your feelings in them, it is worth offering help. For example, “I offer you my sincere condolences in connection with … this loss causedI have bitter feelings. You can count on me if needed.”
Rules of approval and praise
Compliments are an important part of building good relationships, these social strokes are an effective tool for building good relationships. But giving compliments is an art. What distinguishes them from flattery is the degree of exaggeration. A compliment is just a slight exaggeration of the truth. The rules of speech etiquette in Russian say that a compliment and praise should always refer to a person, not to things, so the words: “how does this dress suit you” is a violation of the rules of etiquette, and the real compliment will be the phrase: “how beautiful you are in this the dress . You can and should praise people for everything: for skills, character traits, for performance results, for feelings.
