The negative qualities of a person are by no means innate signs. This is a consequence of upbringing and the lack of he althy introspection, which encourages not only to look for patterns in your behavior that are perceived negatively by others, but also to eradicate them.
"A sarcastic person" - so they say about those who like to make evil jokes. What distinguishes such jokes from humor is the goal: not to amuse the interlocutors and cheer them up, but to morally ex alt oneself above others.
Reasons for behavior
Ironically, the angry, snarky person is a product of our society, the result of his inability to resist behavior that already goes beyond polite communication, but is not yet a legal violation.
The human psyche is focused on responding to all signals from the outside world and adapting to it, changing the line of behavior. There are negative and positive reinforcements for this: every time a person receives a worthy rebuff after an evil joke, their desire to continue to behave inappropriately decreases by an order of magnitude.
In the event that he received a positivereinforcement in the form of the absence of a negative reaction, his desire to continue to behave caustically increases.
This does not always happen consciously: often a person simply cannot reflect on his own behavior, does not think not only about whether his words can hurt others, but is not interested in the reason why the desire to say offensive taunts arose at all.
Come from childhood
Many vices of behavior until recently were justified by improper upbringing or psychological trauma received by a person in childhood. In this light, even the most evil, caustic, insidious person becomes a victim of circumstances and ceases to be responsible for his actions.
Modern psychology is very skeptical about the idea of looking for the causes of behavior in a person's childhood. The psyche of each of us is a very plastic thing, it can easily be changed under the influence of only two factors: motivation (the desire to change something) and steps in this direction.
How does a snarky person behave?
Facing a snarky person is a real challenge for many people. After all, he is able not only to play a joke, he has the ability to see the hidden complexes of a person, pull them out into the light and present them in a grotesque form.
For example, for a girl who is insecure about the shape of her nose, this type will instantly come up with an unflattering comparison to a cartoon character. He will strive to make a quiet and timid person the centerattention.
Paradoxically, people may unconsciously seek to get closer to such a person, thereby trying to protect themselves from witty attacks. But a rare relative of such an individual will not receive his portion of playful insults - this is the line of conduct followed by a sarcastic person. Signs by which you can recognize a person prone to cruel jokes and ridicule are as follows:
- does not show empathy for other people;
- behaves relaxed even with strangers or in a business setting;
- accuses politeness as insincerity.
Sometimes you can understand that you have a caustic person in front of you by his behavior, even if his verbal aggression is directed at another interlocutor. There is every reason to believe that sooner or later it will be you who will fall under the scope of his offensive comments.
How to deal with a snarky person?
"Pay no attention to insults, and a sarcastic person will fall behind you, he will become bored of hurting you" - a popular opinion that reflects reality only partially.
To get up on the same level with the offender and try to respond to the attack with a more caustic joke is really not worth it. First, to engage in a duel with a weapon that an evil prankster knows perfectly means to lose to him in most cases.
Secondly, witticism is a big waste of time, and no onea snarky person is not worth giving him precious minutes.
The best way to fight is physical distance or emotional separation from that person. That is, getting up and leaving is really the right choice if the offense was inflicted intentionally and in a cruel form, and not an escape from the “battlefield.”
Before the distance, you can briefly express a negative attitude to what was said, make it clear that this style of communication is not appropriate, so there is no point in continuing the dialogue. In the event that a caustic person repents and regrets that his wit hurt an interlocutor who is not indifferent to him, he will certainly let you know about it.
The impact of self-esteem
Reliable armor that no bad joke can overcome is stable and good self-esteem. It is very important to evaluate yourself correctly, not overestimating your own expectations from your person, but also not underestimating them.
A person with stable self-esteem usually looks confident, calm and relaxed. Even in the event that an insult veiled as a joke is released in his direction, he is more likely to be surprised than upset or offended. However, this will not prevent him from moving away from such an interlocutor: after all, the ability to evaluate himself correctly carries a bonus in the form of the ability to correctly recognize the attitude of other people towards himself, without justifying them and without building empty illusions.
Emotional distance
Physically detaching from a cruel prankster is easy when he is a casual acquaintance or new buddy. Butwhat if a caustic, treacherous person is your colleague, whose face you see for 40 hours a week? Or, even worse, your immediate supervisor?
In this case, you need to learn how to emotionally distance yourself, to close. At the same time, you can continue dry and polite communication with a person at work. But any attempts to turn the conversation into a personal channel must be firmly but correctly stopped.
If the outrageous behavior of a colleague does not stop, you can and should contact your immediate supervisor to resolve the conflict situation. And if the source of ridicule is the boss himself, it makes sense to think about finding a new job, temporarily putting an internal block on all the jokes he utters.
