Love is complicated. There are no repeating stories. After all, the main thing in this life is to find harmony, and for this, at least you need to start a family. And not just a family, but one in which every day is like a holiday, where children love their parents, and parents idolize their children and each other. But such an idyll can be extremely difficult to achieve. And if the husband is also a sailor and periodically goes on voyages for 3-4 months, what should I do? Today we'll talk about how the chosen ones of the sailors keep their promise to their husband in the registry office.
Should you marry a sailor?
Marriage is voluntary. People take this important step in their lives for many reasons: some because of great love, some to improve their financial situation, and some who simply want children. Whatever the reason, there is no point in judging a woman. She has her own life, and only she can decide what to spend it on. So when a girl marriessailor, she must be aware of what she is doing and what result she will get.
There is a good book by P. Uspensky "The Strange Life of Ivan Osokin". It tells that any of us knows in advance the result of each of our actions, and if any person is given the opportunity to live his life again, not only the end result will be the same, but even the path leading to it. It is not difficult to draw a conclusion from this: even before the wedding, the wives of sailors knew what would await them further. Therefore, if a girl fell in love and understands that this is for life, she will not even have doubts about the correctness of her decision. But if doubts begin to visit, it means that the woman is not sure of her decision.
Of course, many girlfriends will ask provocative questions before the wedding. For example: think about it, is it easy to be a sailor's wife? Do not build illusions that a loved one will quit his job for a woman. Most often, he will seek balance and maneuver between these areas of life. So to answer the question "Should I marry a sailor?" You can do this: "There are doubts - so it's not worth it." If there is no doubt about the correctness of the decision, then this is your person.
How to mentally prepare for parting?
Seeing your loved one on a flight, you do not need to water him with crocodile tears. It won't make it any easier for him or for you. It's already hard for the sailor: he leaves the city, his family and children. If at this moment the wife will vote that she will not survive a new separation, this will be hard labor for a man. You have to part with a smilewhile saying that 3-4 months will fly by unnoticed. Sailors' wives should learn this ritual.
If you really want to cry, it's better to do it at night and tell your pillow about your grief. After all, the behavior of the mother will be copied by her children. Imagine that the whole family will cry at parting. A sailor simply will not go to sea. The choice of each person must be respected. It happens that a man simply does not see life without the sea, you should just put up with it.
After accompanying her husband to the sea, the wife must continue to maintain the morale of herself and her family. In calls and letters, of course, you can say / write that you miss, but do not talk about it through every sentence. You need to learn how to live without a husband.
What do sailors' wives do when their husbands are on a voyage? Most often, they raise children, and devote their free time to their hobbies or self-development. And also the main task is to keep the fire in the family hearth so that it does not die out during the flight.
How to keep in touch?
Sailors' wives today have the opportunity to call their husbands even on the other side of the world. Thanks to Skype, WhatsApp and Viber, you don't even have to pay for such calls.
Of course, the Internet is not everywhere. For example, at the North Pole it will be simply impossible to contact your husband. In this case, lovers use ordinary paper letters. It is clear that such messages can take 2-3 months, but how nice it is to receive news from home. Many women, andsome sailors put their photos in envelopes. This sweet tradition allows you to see the main events of the family at least on paper. After all, sailors, by the will of fate, can miss such significant events as the birth of a wife, the first steps of a child, the admission of children to school or college.
Besides photographs, some of the husbands who work on the ship compose poems about the wives of sailors. This form of expression of love is available even to those people who are not strong in poetry. The main thing for girls is attention and form. Of course, the content is also important, but still it often fades into the background. Women, on the other hand, often include children's drawings in their letters.
Thus, they help their child not to forget about dad. This connection is important, because there are often cases when a sailor goes on a voyage for 4 months, and a small child manages to forget him during this time. The main task of a mother is not to remind children about dad as often as possible.
Change is always for the better
Young wives of sailors are often surprised that their lover went on a voyage with one person and came with another. This happens all the time. After all, in 3-4 months, any person changes. But when these changes happen before your eyes, they are easy to accept. A real sailor's wife will never reproach her husband for changing. After all, any change is always for the better. The main task of a woman is to find these best changes and focus on them.
A woman also changes during flights. Big changes in life come with birthchild. A woman gets used to the fact that the center of the universe is her child, and men often do not like this. They want the wife to devote every free minute to him during the arrival. Therefore, often sailors are simply jealous of a wife for a child. Of course, many women have enough time to spend it on both their husband and child. It is these relationships that are harmonious. The family starts to get to know each other again every time, because it's so interesting.
It must be remembered that a person's character and worldview are formed before the age of 25. After this age, a person will also change, but mostly insignificantly. He may change his tastes and preferences, but his character will remain the same. The wife should understand this, every time she meets her husband and finds some changes in him. We must not forget about the main qualities of a man, thanks to which he became her lover.
Magic months together
Wives of long-distance sailors sometimes have to wait for their husbands for 9 months. But when the men return home, the happiest time comes. Every time, after a long wait, young wives perceive their husband's return home as another honeymoon. All insults, hardships and quarrels are forgotten. Only the brightest moments remain in memory. A woman and a man at first enjoy the company of each other and children, if they have already appeared in the family. Such moments adore young talents. Their dad is a magician. He returns home and brings with him not only gifts, but also family comfort.
Mom becomes happy, and everything around is painted only in bright colors. After the first honeymoon weeks, the family is ready to meet friends and family. As if nothing had happened, sailors with their wives walk, go to restaurants and cinema, and sometimes even go on vacation to the islands. The main difference between families in which a woman does not see her man for more than six months is that there are practically no quarrels here. There is no time to swear, and there are usually no reasons. After all, families are usually destroyed by life, but here it is too short to have time to pull the blanket over you.
How to raise children?
When a woman's husband is a sailor, the upbringing of children falls on her shoulders. There is no need to blame the father for not doing his job well. In such families, dad is a magical person who allows everything. But mom is angry, she forbids, says to put away toys and do homework.
It is often unbearably difficult for a woman, even more difficult than for single mothers. After all, single women know that they have no one to rely on, and the sailor's wife has support, it's just that she is usually very far away.
How do children welcome sailors? With pleasure. They are glad that finally, albeit for a short period, but their family will become complete. Children grow accustomed to their father's flights as they age and look forward to their father on dry land.
The upbringing in the family is mainly done by grandparents. Moreover, the sons of sailors, despite the eternal absence of their father, also want to go on flights. see the world,admire unusually beautiful natural phenomena, meet people of other nationalities - all these adventures seem like a fairy tale to little boys. Mothers try to dissuade their sons from such a risky profession, but boys, if they do not choose a career as sailors, then often take the military path. Girls brought up in a family of sailors usually get used to idolizing men. They see how lovingly mom looks at dad. And then the girls will carry this relationship in their souls for the rest of their lives. They will look for a man who is openly admired.
Do cheating happen?
When a husband is a sailor, the wife involuntarily wonders how he copes on voyages without her. After all, one thing is spiritual intimacy, and quite another is physical. Of course, every girl hopes that her chosen one is faithful to her and does not look after local beauties during the ship's stay in foreign countries.
Men on the ship have a rule according to which colleagues in the shop do not spread to other people's wives about cheating. Therefore, it makes no sense to ask her husband's colleagues about the truth. You just have to rely on the fidelity of your spouse. Indeed, in some families, men manage to cheat, living with their wife in the same apartment and not even leaving on business trips. Loy alty is not some kind of character trait, it is the same quality as mercy and friendliness, it needs to be developed.
Sailors' wives are said to cheat more often than their husbands. This is false information, it's just much easier to convict a wife of treason. Friendly neighbors and friends will always be found. But to find evidence againsthusband will be very difficult. But women who are not married to a sailor cheat. Therefore, it is difficult to sum up the statistics. You can simply say that it is quite possible to be faithful.
The most famous sailors' wives
There are many stories about how masculine women can be. Today, girls work in the police, security, investigative agencies, etc. But there are women who do not save the world, but they have the most difficult task - to wait for their husband from swimming. But not all flights are commercial. Some ships are sent to fight piracy. This is exactly what the story will be about.
Elena Antsiferova is the wife of the Marshal Shaposhnikov ship commander. May 7, 2010 a woman will remember for a long time. It was on this day that her husband fought the pirates and freed the tanker. The work was dangerous, and the end of the fight was unpredictable. The woman and her two daughters did not find a place for themselves for two days. They hoped for a successful ending of the operation, which eventually took place. Such stories happen often. The sailors' wives were even erected a monument in Odessa. This bronze statue serves as a symbol of love and fidelity. Thanks to the women they love, men can perform even the most difficult operation.
Children of sailors
They say that love is tested by distance. Children of seafarers are subjected to such checks more than once a year. And despite this, dad remains the most beloved person on the planet. You need to take an example from him, because he is a person who has a lot of life experience behind him.
We have already said that, growing up, the sons of sailors often choosemilitary career. If the family had good, warm relations, if the mother loved the father, then the son will be sure that he will always be able to find a loving wife. Moreover, this confidence will be so strong that he will not even be able to think that his beloved will not want to go with him to the ends of the world.
Navy sailor is a respected and well-paid profession. Needless to say, the families of such people live in luxury. Children get used to this level of prosperity and all their lives they cannot lower this bar. On the one hand, this is good - it means that there will always be something to strive for, but on the other hand, others may call such grown-up children snobs.
Family Traditions
Being married to a sailor is a responsible task. In order for family life to be happy, you need to be able to start your own traditions. One of the main ones, of course, will be meeting the sailor from the voyage. This exciting moment a woman can beat in various ways. One of them is to cook a delicious dinner and have an unforgettable evening. There is room for fantasy. We also need to find a way to celebrate family holidays.
It is difficult to celebrate the New Year without a husband, but the children will still be waiting for the holiday. A woman should be the head of the family and be able to provide an interesting event for her relatives. Modern technologies allow you to establish video communication, and if this is not possible, then you need to record congratulatory videos in advance. Children will be delighted with such a gift. It is especially nice if these messages become a tradition. Daughters and sons will wait for congratulations from dad for every holiday. Andfather must not fail. Original 5-minute videos will help reduce the distance, and most importantly, the children will know that dad remembers them. Of course, you can also use the mail service. Writing letters, greeting cards, writing poems - all this will help brighten up the expectation and establish close contact between all family members. The tradition of joint opening of the message also has a place to be. All family members gather for dinner and read news from foreign countries written by a loved one. All this, of course, is trifles, but it is from them that a happy family life will develop.
